Self-Care is not selfish….you can’t pour from an empty cup!

Have you ever noticed that a Mom is always the last person to sit down and enjoy her meal in the evening? We first make sure everyone is happy and has their food and only then do we sit down with what is left over, which is often cold. No sooner have we sat down and there is a request for juice or a condiment which has us leaping off our chair.

We are also not great at spoiling ourselves, and put our needs very low down on the monthly budget list, and very rarely on the priority list. Whether it be scouring the sale rails end of season for a new outfit after spending a small fortune on school uniforms, or cancelling our hair appointment to cover the costs of an unplanned school outing, many of us are guilty of going without! Whilst I am not saying we must send our kids to school with holey shoes or leave our four year olds to dish-up for themselves, I am just suggesting we find a little ‘me’ time in our busy schedules.

Somehow we have allowed ourselves to believe that unless we are completely self-sacrificing, we aren’t being the best Mom. We complain that we have no time for ourselves but often we are the ones who are guilty of not making that time. It’s a lot harder than it sounds, I know, but finding a way of getting even just half an hour a day for yourself can be all it takes. A refreshed Mom is a happier Mom, and a happy Mom is a good Mom …. so you taking some time out is also for the benefit of your children.

Resist the pressure to fit into a perfect mother’s mold, and eliminate the things from your daily list that you feel obligated to do. Just keep those you want to do. These tasks will differ from Mom to Mom but we all know those tasks or projects we undertake purely because there is another Mom in our circle that does it, so we convince ourselves we must follow suit and add it to our ever-growing list.

Well listen up ladies, we don’t need to! Ditch those lists and obligations. It doesn’t matter if we can’t bake the perfect gluten, sugar, dairy free vegan treats for our children’s lunch boxes. Throw in an apple and be done with it. Use the time to get the essential tasks out of the way so you make some time, however little, to do something for you. 

Same goes for purchases, your children don’t need the latest and so called greatest toy, gadget or fashion trend. They will benefit far more from the intangible gifts you can give them and in order to give them those, you need your cup to be full as you can’t pour from an empty one. So if sneaking in a mini ‘spoil’ for yourself versus adding the cash towards an extravagant present is what fills your cup ….. then do it!

As mothers, we have become expert jugglers, but we need to somehow ensure one of the balls has our own name on it and that it isn’t the ball that is always being dropped!

So this Sunday, take a few minutes to reflect on how you can put a little extra time and effort into spoiling yourself! You have earned it.

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